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PART II
Chuck this analytical business and take life lightly, urged her brother. I take life lightly and so does Fay. Shes a perfect skylark. Doesnt look a day ahead or a day backwards.
She met his eyes squarely without the least bit of a flutter, but a faint flush rose to her smooth cheeks. Well, come, she said, putting her hand within his arm. I am engaged for thisbut my partner has kept me waiting. So he can lose the dance. A laggard dancer, like a laggard lover, deserves to lose his partner.
Were not very lucky, are we?... She turned abruptly to him, her hands gripping the edge of the verandah, her eyes bright with a curious wildness. Colin, Im sometimes so frightened of the future. Im twenty-four now. Shall I always go on being unhappy and dissatisfied until I become a nasty, bitter, lonely old woman, jealous of every happy couple I meet, envious of everyone elses happiness? Its a horrid picture, isnt it?
I am in sympathy with you Gilbert. She carefully kept her eyes from his face, as though that would break the chain of her thoughts. And I dont want you to be a stupid, love-sick swain, but How could she make him understand without seeming petty and unreasonable? Gilbert, she went on quickly, determined to say frankly what she was thinking, is everything in your life subservient to your work? Sometimes you talk as if everything elseas though we were the rungs upon which you mounted the ladder. When you talk of wasting timethings being trivial and not worth whileyour face becomes so contemptuous and hard[85] and engrossed it makes me frightened. I want you to have a career; I wouldnt have married an idle man. I will help you in every way I can; I shant expect impossible attentionbut, Gilbert, I want our marriage to mean something to you, a big something.
By and by, he said casually, Mr. Colin Paton is a friend of yours, is he not? I think I have heard you mention his name?
Fay gave a whoop that showed her lungs were not affected.
He strolled away from the restaurant. It was warm[57] and sunny, and the pedestrians seemed all in a good humour. Paton often wandered for hours through the streets of London, finding in that wonderful panorama food for eyes and brain and heart. He loved the feeling that he was part of the crowd, and his mind was stored with many observations and memories. The romance of the streets was no idle journalistic phrase to him. He felt it around him on all sides, plucking at him with alluring fingers leading him into the land of dreams. Often at night he would give himself wholly up to its enchantment, wandering along mile after mile through quaint byways and on misty commons, through silent Suburbia and the noisy, restless East-end slums. London was to him a book of unending pages with countless illustrations.